There seems to be a contrasting energy in our house right now leading up to the New Year. Steve has been a whirlwind of projects as he’s spent the past few days busily tying up loose ends and completing projects before 2009 leaps upon us. I, on the other hand, have been more in a state of quiet reflection as I watch the calendar slowly come to its final day.
Last night, while Steve was painting our kitchen, I curled up on our couch downstairs and watched the second half of Anne of Green Gables. This was, by far, my favourite movie growing up and it’s been over a decade since I last saw it. When I was little I could literally recite the entire movie word for word. I discovered last night that, even at thirty, I still love every moment of that movie. I never realized before though just how romantic it really was! The love/hate relationship between Anne and Gilbert is desperately romantic and had I been any older when I first saw it, I don’t know if I ever would have been able to wait to find out if they finally found their way to each other. The agony would have killed me.
Watching the movie started me thinking about feminism and how very different it’s become over the years. Coincidentally enough, one of my other favourite movies is Little Women; a movie whose main character - Josephine, is very much like Anne. Both are strong, brilliant, determined women who decide that in order to pursue their craft, they must forgo the likes of other womanly desires, such as romance and a family. In the end though, love always conquers and they discover that no amount of scholarships and or academic achievements can replace our natural inclinations to need another human being.
I’m sure that in Anne and Josephine’s day, to have gone against such conventional wisdom would have most certainly deemed them as feminists. A hundred years later though, I watch either movie and find myself longing for a day of puffed sleeves and horse-drawn carriages. The romance of “courting” and dance cards is overwhelming beautiful to me and yet, all the while, it’s the same thing that most women were hoping to break free from.
I live in a day and age where it’s never occurred to me that I couldn’t have both a career and a family. I’ve never had to choose between a man and a corporate title but if I did, I’m sure that women every where would likely be disappointed to know that I the man would probably win. In fact, whenever the topic of men would arise in my life, I would often hear the age old argument “You can’t let the opportunity to {insert career possibility here} pass you by for a man!” Every time I heard this though I always thought to myself “How is a relationship not an opportunity as well?” Of course, having to choose one over the other is not ideal in any situation but if the decision was between a brand new relationship and having to move far away for a new career (in which case, the relationship would have to be sacrificed as a result) why exactly, is it assumed that the career is always the better choice? That new relationship could end up being the relationship and the relationship could result in marriage and that marriage could result in creating a family and fifty years later, you could wake up and realize that you chose a lifetime of miracles over a job. Why is that so bad?
Maybe it’s just the idea of wanting something that you can’t have. Maybe Anne and Josephine longed for the life that they were encouraged to put aside because they didn’t want to fit a mold that they were expected to live up to. Maybe I find Christmas Balls and afternoon tea romantic because it too, is something that I have never lived.
Once again, I will end a year with more questions than I have answers! But isn’t that always the case?!?!
On the bright side though, tonight I will bundle myself up (it is -25 degrees Celsius in Ottawa today!), take my handsome husband by the arm and participate in some New Year’s Eve festivities. Then, come Monday morning, when we’re all rested and recovered, I will dress my corporate self up and greet my wonderful colleagues in the office for yet another year. Best of all though, I will do so with the grateful knowledge that I was fortunate enough to never have to make the decision. Thanks to the likes of Anne and Josephine, I get to ring in 2009 with the best of both worlds!
Happy New Year! May your 2009 be merry and bright!
Last night, while Steve was painting our kitchen, I curled up on our couch downstairs and watched the second half of Anne of Green Gables. This was, by far, my favourite movie growing up and it’s been over a decade since I last saw it. When I was little I could literally recite the entire movie word for word. I discovered last night that, even at thirty, I still love every moment of that movie. I never realized before though just how romantic it really was! The love/hate relationship between Anne and Gilbert is desperately romantic and had I been any older when I first saw it, I don’t know if I ever would have been able to wait to find out if they finally found their way to each other. The agony would have killed me.
Watching the movie started me thinking about feminism and how very different it’s become over the years. Coincidentally enough, one of my other favourite movies is Little Women; a movie whose main character - Josephine, is very much like Anne. Both are strong, brilliant, determined women who decide that in order to pursue their craft, they must forgo the likes of other womanly desires, such as romance and a family. In the end though, love always conquers and they discover that no amount of scholarships and or academic achievements can replace our natural inclinations to need another human being.
I’m sure that in Anne and Josephine’s day, to have gone against such conventional wisdom would have most certainly deemed them as feminists. A hundred years later though, I watch either movie and find myself longing for a day of puffed sleeves and horse-drawn carriages. The romance of “courting” and dance cards is overwhelming beautiful to me and yet, all the while, it’s the same thing that most women were hoping to break free from.
I live in a day and age where it’s never occurred to me that I couldn’t have both a career and a family. I’ve never had to choose between a man and a corporate title but if I did, I’m sure that women every where would likely be disappointed to know that I the man would probably win. In fact, whenever the topic of men would arise in my life, I would often hear the age old argument “You can’t let the opportunity to {insert career possibility here} pass you by for a man!” Every time I heard this though I always thought to myself “How is a relationship not an opportunity as well?” Of course, having to choose one over the other is not ideal in any situation but if the decision was between a brand new relationship and having to move far away for a new career (in which case, the relationship would have to be sacrificed as a result) why exactly, is it assumed that the career is always the better choice? That new relationship could end up being the relationship and the relationship could result in marriage and that marriage could result in creating a family and fifty years later, you could wake up and realize that you chose a lifetime of miracles over a job. Why is that so bad?
Maybe it’s just the idea of wanting something that you can’t have. Maybe Anne and Josephine longed for the life that they were encouraged to put aside because they didn’t want to fit a mold that they were expected to live up to. Maybe I find Christmas Balls and afternoon tea romantic because it too, is something that I have never lived.
Once again, I will end a year with more questions than I have answers! But isn’t that always the case?!?!
On the bright side though, tonight I will bundle myself up (it is -25 degrees Celsius in Ottawa today!), take my handsome husband by the arm and participate in some New Year’s Eve festivities. Then, come Monday morning, when we’re all rested and recovered, I will dress my corporate self up and greet my wonderful colleagues in the office for yet another year. Best of all though, I will do so with the grateful knowledge that I was fortunate enough to never have to make the decision. Thanks to the likes of Anne and Josephine, I get to ring in 2009 with the best of both worlds!
Happy New Year! May your 2009 be merry and bright!
2 comments:
happy '09 to you and yours :D
forgot: halifax is under a blizzard warning, 35+ cm of snow with 100+ kph winds, beginning late tonite :(
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