The other day, a colleague and I were at the corner waiting to cross the street and standing on the opposite side of the street was a family with their teenage son. Their son had Downs syndrome. My colleague looked over at the boy and then over to me and said “Gosh, that’s so sad. I would like to know one day why God does that to people.” “Why?” I asked. “Well, he’ll never be able to have jobs like us or experience life like us. There is just so much that he will miss out on.” I just smiled at my colleague and looked across the street. The boy had a huge smile on his face and was completely fascinated with the newly falling snow. In fact, he looked happier than anyone else I had seen that day.
I spent a lot of time when I was younger with other children who lived with Downs syndrome and from my experience; they appear to be some of the happiest and most vibrant people that I’ve ever met. My life was, most definitely, made richer by having known them and having shared in their lives. People living with Downs have a purer sense of innocence that fills their days and a childlike approach to life that the rest of us seem to grow out of at a certain age. They don’t learn judgment the same way or many of the other detrimental emotions that keep us hurting ourselves and each other. I really had to wonder if, given the choice, they even want to see life any other way?
The reality was that it was sadder for us to witness his disability then it was for him to live with it because likewise, we can’t imagine our lives being any other way. Would his life really be better with a corporate job and a blackberry in hand or can fulfillment still be found in watching the snow fall? Would his life genuinely be more worthwhile with bigger dreams and bigger vision instead of contentment in the small joys and abundance in everyday life? It’s a classic case of having tunnel vision but, as North Americans, I think that it’s begun to reach out into far more than just the boy across the street. It lead me consider how many other things we impose our sense of happiness upon assuming that our “shoes” are the only ones worth walking in.
Steve and I were discussing the other day about the whole concept of “fair trade” and how it’s perceived by our society. Steve and I do not go out of our way to purchase products that are fair trade and while we are certainly not oppose to it in any way, we do question certain aspects of its rationale. I’ll be the first to admit that I don’t know a great deal about fair trade other than what is presented to me from our local businesses but, based on that knowledge alone…I’m lead to believe that we are encouraging better pay, better working conditions and a “fair” exchange of services between us, the consumer, and them, the provider. There is, of course, an entire environmental aspect to this as well but for the most part, I get the impression that it has a lot to do with the lively hood of those working on the other end of our morning coffee. Okay, so this is very noble, I agree, but (there’s always a but) who decided that “they” needed rescuing in the first place? I’m not criticizing as much as I am genuinely asking if they are truly unhappy. True, they likely make less (comparatively) and it’s also true that their lives are spent at the hands of a field instead of a business office but who’s to say that they are not happy to harvest fields all day and be out in the sunlight? Would they even want an office job or rush hour traffic? Are we assuming that because their lives are not like our lives, then they can’t possibly be happy and in turn, it’s our job to save them?
This very question also brought about my very mixed emotions about the Middle East and Islamic culture. We, as a society, are very quick to judge their motivations and intentions. We consider them violent, oppressed and behind the times socially. I agree that there are elements of their culture that I struggle with and violence is certainly one of them. I am appalled at the idea of stoning a person because of their infidelities but I’m equally appalled at the idea of dragging a black man behind a pick up truck because of the colour of his skin…and that happened in the U.S. We look at them and see mistreatment of women and distortion of religion. For all we know, they may look at us and see misguided youth and a value system so deteriorated that we have entire magazines devoted to celebrity gossip. We see them covered head to toe in a veil as a lack of rights and they may see us without enough self-respect to dress for any purpose other than sex. We assume that all of these things, because we don’t share them, must mean that they are unhappy. We assume that their lack of reality television and wardrobe attire to choose from must mean that they feel deprivation that we, of course, need to rescue them from. To take over another country under a cloak of good intention and to assume that our way of doing things would suit them better poses a lot of questions for me. First and foremost, it sparks the question of whether or not our way even works for us nonetheless anyone else?
On that note, let’s take this opportunity to look at our lives for a moment; we are a society of great wealth and consumption. We work long hours and grow up too fast. We are connected to each other at all times while never really being connected to anyone at all. We are in a constant hurry to get to places that they don’t generally want to be. We have the convenience of doing our grocery shopping from home and all the while, we’ve never been more stressed. Our bodies are filled with disease and our minds are filled with dis-ease. We aim for bigger houses, faster cars and fancier televisions when we should be aiming for broader perspectives, grandeur experiences and better relationships…and I don’t mean with our cell phones.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m not judging the state of how we live our lives. It’s all relative and our necessities sit pretty low on the hierarchy of needs. More importantly though, I feed the beast in my own way as well but what I’m questioning is whether or not our morals and values are really the appropriate measuring stick by which all others should be judged? We live lives that seem privileged and innovative. We live lives that seem a step above the rest but we also live lives that are out of touch with the very basics of what it means to be human. Life is simply not meant to be lived in nothing but a frenzy of technology and corporate ladders.
So, all this being said, as I looked across the street at the teenage boy joyfully catching snow flakes on his tongue and fully immersed in the day that God had given him…I couldn’t help but painfully wonder if we were the ones who really needed to be saved?
I spent a lot of time when I was younger with other children who lived with Downs syndrome and from my experience; they appear to be some of the happiest and most vibrant people that I’ve ever met. My life was, most definitely, made richer by having known them and having shared in their lives. People living with Downs have a purer sense of innocence that fills their days and a childlike approach to life that the rest of us seem to grow out of at a certain age. They don’t learn judgment the same way or many of the other detrimental emotions that keep us hurting ourselves and each other. I really had to wonder if, given the choice, they even want to see life any other way?
The reality was that it was sadder for us to witness his disability then it was for him to live with it because likewise, we can’t imagine our lives being any other way. Would his life really be better with a corporate job and a blackberry in hand or can fulfillment still be found in watching the snow fall? Would his life genuinely be more worthwhile with bigger dreams and bigger vision instead of contentment in the small joys and abundance in everyday life? It’s a classic case of having tunnel vision but, as North Americans, I think that it’s begun to reach out into far more than just the boy across the street. It lead me consider how many other things we impose our sense of happiness upon assuming that our “shoes” are the only ones worth walking in.
Steve and I were discussing the other day about the whole concept of “fair trade” and how it’s perceived by our society. Steve and I do not go out of our way to purchase products that are fair trade and while we are certainly not oppose to it in any way, we do question certain aspects of its rationale. I’ll be the first to admit that I don’t know a great deal about fair trade other than what is presented to me from our local businesses but, based on that knowledge alone…I’m lead to believe that we are encouraging better pay, better working conditions and a “fair” exchange of services between us, the consumer, and them, the provider. There is, of course, an entire environmental aspect to this as well but for the most part, I get the impression that it has a lot to do with the lively hood of those working on the other end of our morning coffee. Okay, so this is very noble, I agree, but (there’s always a but) who decided that “they” needed rescuing in the first place? I’m not criticizing as much as I am genuinely asking if they are truly unhappy. True, they likely make less (comparatively) and it’s also true that their lives are spent at the hands of a field instead of a business office but who’s to say that they are not happy to harvest fields all day and be out in the sunlight? Would they even want an office job or rush hour traffic? Are we assuming that because their lives are not like our lives, then they can’t possibly be happy and in turn, it’s our job to save them?
This very question also brought about my very mixed emotions about the Middle East and Islamic culture. We, as a society, are very quick to judge their motivations and intentions. We consider them violent, oppressed and behind the times socially. I agree that there are elements of their culture that I struggle with and violence is certainly one of them. I am appalled at the idea of stoning a person because of their infidelities but I’m equally appalled at the idea of dragging a black man behind a pick up truck because of the colour of his skin…and that happened in the U.S. We look at them and see mistreatment of women and distortion of religion. For all we know, they may look at us and see misguided youth and a value system so deteriorated that we have entire magazines devoted to celebrity gossip. We see them covered head to toe in a veil as a lack of rights and they may see us without enough self-respect to dress for any purpose other than sex. We assume that all of these things, because we don’t share them, must mean that they are unhappy. We assume that their lack of reality television and wardrobe attire to choose from must mean that they feel deprivation that we, of course, need to rescue them from. To take over another country under a cloak of good intention and to assume that our way of doing things would suit them better poses a lot of questions for me. First and foremost, it sparks the question of whether or not our way even works for us nonetheless anyone else?
On that note, let’s take this opportunity to look at our lives for a moment; we are a society of great wealth and consumption. We work long hours and grow up too fast. We are connected to each other at all times while never really being connected to anyone at all. We are in a constant hurry to get to places that they don’t generally want to be. We have the convenience of doing our grocery shopping from home and all the while, we’ve never been more stressed. Our bodies are filled with disease and our minds are filled with dis-ease. We aim for bigger houses, faster cars and fancier televisions when we should be aiming for broader perspectives, grandeur experiences and better relationships…and I don’t mean with our cell phones.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m not judging the state of how we live our lives. It’s all relative and our necessities sit pretty low on the hierarchy of needs. More importantly though, I feed the beast in my own way as well but what I’m questioning is whether or not our morals and values are really the appropriate measuring stick by which all others should be judged? We live lives that seem privileged and innovative. We live lives that seem a step above the rest but we also live lives that are out of touch with the very basics of what it means to be human. Life is simply not meant to be lived in nothing but a frenzy of technology and corporate ladders.
So, all this being said, as I looked across the street at the teenage boy joyfully catching snow flakes on his tongue and fully immersed in the day that God had given him…I couldn’t help but painfully wonder if we were the ones who really needed to be saved?
4 comments:
I think this is m favorite so far.
There are days when I crave a simpler way of life. An easier way of being. I despair that we live in soulless times. And then I catch a moment of pure joy or beauty and I think that life is full and glorious.
"The more I learn, the less I know."
It's so true!
Sometimes I long to be living in a monastery on a mountain somewhere. But then, I also long to be running with my amazing friends and realize just how long the drive would be from that mountain!(Not to mention that it might be a bit more hill training that I had ever hoped for!!)
Isolation from this world does sound appealing sometimes but nothing is ever more appealing than seeing the faces that I love (blackberry in hand or not!)
Bravo. Well said friend.
what do we want actually in life?
glory or happiness?
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