“The Lord giveth and the Lord taketh away” ~ Job 1:21
I’ve been thinking about this passage a lot lately. I woke up this morning finally starting to feel like myself again. I’ve been a bit anxious about the dark lately and finding myself procrastinating about having to turn off the lights each night. Things always seem harder for me in the dark and it was such a relief to awake this morning realizing that I had finally slept soundly through the night.
When I reflect on all that we’ve been through over the past week, I recognize more and more how hard it is for us humans to deal with the unexpected. Job 1:21 clearly states that the powers that be hold the future in their hands, and yet we are a breed that thrives off having control. We’ve managed to control so much of our lives and our world; we control our climates and our communication, we control our schedules and our need for convenience. We can even control our moods and our sleep patterns through a variety of means. Nature doesn’t play a very strong role in our day to day lives anymore and when something comes along that can’t be controlled with technology or medication, we find ourselves crippled in fear at our inability to let go of the final outcome.
But alas, the Lord gives and the Lord takes away. For better or for worse, this is life. And like Jacob, we struggle with it. We fight with God over it and in the end, we lose. We stumble over ourselves trying to prevent anything from being taken away but why does it have to be such a bad thing? It’s true…the Lord does take away jobs, loved ones and security. But the Lord also takes away fear, doubt and cancer.
As I sit in the midst of the latest that has been taken away, I also realize that it’s small in comparison to what has been given. While our joy and anticipation has been taken away, the necessary strength and courage has been given. While innocence and immediate hope has been taken away, faithfulness and trust has been given. While certainty and confidence were taken away, perspective and gratitude were given.
The Lord gives and the Lord takes away.
Life is really about character and the only way to determine our future is by how we choose to handle the past. A life spent only in blissful perfection is not a life gained by knowledge or growth. Can you fully appreciate the happiness never having experienced the pain? Can you truly leave a mark if you’ve never been inflicted with one?
I’ve decided to take this as a time to grow. I’ve decided that as we cradle our heads in our hands, we will take this experience and add another notch in our belts. It will be yet another battle scar in a life that is uniquely ours. The dust is settling and we are opening our eyes in astonishment at how much life can change so quickly and more so, just how much we can change with it. For all of our controlling tendencies, it’s possible that we don’t give ourselves enough credit.
I remember vividly standing in our shower saying out loud to myself “I don’t think that I can do this” and all the while, suddenly realizing that I was doing this. It was happening and I was okay. It wasn’t pleasant and it wasn’t pretty but the battlefields of life seldom are. But sure enough, I was still breathing and living and surviving and being. Life was happening and so was I. In all of my worst imaginings, I would have been curled on the floor of the shower in a twisted mess of panic and despair. Instead, I breathed, and I breathed, and I breathed again.
And that’s what you do; you breathe and you breathe and you breathe again until one day you wake up feeling more like more yourself because for every restless night there awaits a new awakening.
The Lord gives and the Lord takes away.
I’ve been thinking about this passage a lot lately. I woke up this morning finally starting to feel like myself again. I’ve been a bit anxious about the dark lately and finding myself procrastinating about having to turn off the lights each night. Things always seem harder for me in the dark and it was such a relief to awake this morning realizing that I had finally slept soundly through the night.
When I reflect on all that we’ve been through over the past week, I recognize more and more how hard it is for us humans to deal with the unexpected. Job 1:21 clearly states that the powers that be hold the future in their hands, and yet we are a breed that thrives off having control. We’ve managed to control so much of our lives and our world; we control our climates and our communication, we control our schedules and our need for convenience. We can even control our moods and our sleep patterns through a variety of means. Nature doesn’t play a very strong role in our day to day lives anymore and when something comes along that can’t be controlled with technology or medication, we find ourselves crippled in fear at our inability to let go of the final outcome.
But alas, the Lord gives and the Lord takes away. For better or for worse, this is life. And like Jacob, we struggle with it. We fight with God over it and in the end, we lose. We stumble over ourselves trying to prevent anything from being taken away but why does it have to be such a bad thing? It’s true…the Lord does take away jobs, loved ones and security. But the Lord also takes away fear, doubt and cancer.
As I sit in the midst of the latest that has been taken away, I also realize that it’s small in comparison to what has been given. While our joy and anticipation has been taken away, the necessary strength and courage has been given. While innocence and immediate hope has been taken away, faithfulness and trust has been given. While certainty and confidence were taken away, perspective and gratitude were given.
The Lord gives and the Lord takes away.
Life is really about character and the only way to determine our future is by how we choose to handle the past. A life spent only in blissful perfection is not a life gained by knowledge or growth. Can you fully appreciate the happiness never having experienced the pain? Can you truly leave a mark if you’ve never been inflicted with one?
I’ve decided to take this as a time to grow. I’ve decided that as we cradle our heads in our hands, we will take this experience and add another notch in our belts. It will be yet another battle scar in a life that is uniquely ours. The dust is settling and we are opening our eyes in astonishment at how much life can change so quickly and more so, just how much we can change with it. For all of our controlling tendencies, it’s possible that we don’t give ourselves enough credit.
I remember vividly standing in our shower saying out loud to myself “I don’t think that I can do this” and all the while, suddenly realizing that I was doing this. It was happening and I was okay. It wasn’t pleasant and it wasn’t pretty but the battlefields of life seldom are. But sure enough, I was still breathing and living and surviving and being. Life was happening and so was I. In all of my worst imaginings, I would have been curled on the floor of the shower in a twisted mess of panic and despair. Instead, I breathed, and I breathed, and I breathed again.
And that’s what you do; you breathe and you breathe and you breathe again until one day you wake up feeling more like more yourself because for every restless night there awaits a new awakening.
The Lord gives and the Lord takes away.
1 comment:
I may not know what you are going through my dear new friend, but you write out your feelings so beautifully, that I know this experience will help others! God will bless your faithfulness!
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