Diaries from Down Under

Chapter Seven

Tuesday, April 22nd, 2008

It’s 3:47am and we are flying somewhere over the Pacific Ocean. The passengers are quiet, the lights are dim and the winds are turbulent. It hasn’t been a very smooth flight so far. I’m not a very nervous flyer but, every now and then, at moments like this, I am reminded that I have put my life in someone else’s hands and that, regardless of the circumstances, there is absolutely nothing that I can do to change that. What happens on this plane is out of my control…and that is a feeling that doesn’t always sit well with me.

As I think about it though, I find it interesting that we tend to notice the circumstances out of our control far more often than the ones that are within our control. So often, we fall victim to hopelessness and feel the necessity to surrender our choices. Sometimes, we do so for the “greater good”, other times we do so because we are too afraid of the alternative but, the bottom line is that we, as humans, can do a lot with our lives.

I’ve had a lot of time to think during this trip. Many hours spent on planes, driving in the car and sailing on the ocean have provided me with the solitude that I often can’t get in my day to day life. I’ve thought about our life, the future of our life and the contributions that I may or may not make to it. I’ve also thought about other people’s lives and the significance that they have on my own. We tend to be very frivolous and selfish about our relationships, often taking for granted the very ones that mean the most to us.

The past two or three years has been an incredible time of growth for me regarding the most important relationship in my life…the one I have with myself. A lot of time and effort has been spent on my part to sort through many things and make some very important decisions. I’ll be the first to say that it was really difficult and upsetting most of the time but, I’ve changed more in three short years than I have at any other time in my life. Up until that point, most of my decisions were made to accommodate other people and to manage their needs. The concept of making decisions that meet my own needs is a bit like Australia…foreign territory. When you’ve spent a life neglecting your own needs, making the decision to do otherwise opens up a whole new realm of possibilities and interests. The happiness that has come from it has encouraged me to take every opportunity I can to reflect on where I am relative to the life that I am living.

This trip has provided the unique opportunity to take a step back and see our lives from another perspective. Being on the other side of the world and outside of our element brings about a lot of emotion. It changes you, it changes how you see the world and most of all, it changes how you see the things that you’ve left behind.

Steve and I have made choices over the course of our time together that has led to this moment…to this plane ride home in the dead of the night. We chose to travel across the world to see family that we can’t bear to be away from for too long. That is a significant decision to make. It’s been an investment of time, energy and money, and yet…we chose to make it happen. And it was amazing!

This realization inspired me to look at what other things I could choose that I never have before because of the overwhelming feat of doing so. I concluded that my life is so filled with blessings right now that that in and of itself overwhelms me most of the time but, I still feel the best way to live life is to love many things. And I do love many things…but I don’t necessarily surround myself with those things as often I could.

I love animals but I don’t have a pet. I actually really do love mornings but I don’t get up early. I love candlelight but I never want to use up my candles. I love the French language but I’m too self-conscious to speak it. The list goes on but, hopefully not for much longer because life from the other side of the world has taught me that it’s not enough to want to sit under the Southern Cross...you have to see it and marvel at it and let it transform your life. Anything else is not a life spent living…it’s only a life spent wondering.

Wondering doesn’t make you fall in love…sitting under the Southern Cross does!

Diaries from Down Under

Chapter Six

Friday, April 18th, 2008

Two years ago, when we first started considering this trip, it was because Jeff was hopefully going to be posted here for one year to do staff college. Sure enough, he got his wish and now, two years later, we are finding ourselves having family dinners around a table in Australia instead of in Ontario.

Families are complicated and large, extended families can be even more so. It certainly goes without saying that it can sometimes take a great deal of work to manage relationships within a family unit but, at other times, you are fortunate enough to also find yourself with friends and it makes the time of building lives together a completely different experience. Intertwined among the Smyth family is just that…a bunch of friends masquerading as “in-laws”!!!

When I was young, all of my mom’s family would go to Cypress Lake together every year for the May 2-4 weekend. We would pile kids, dogs, tents and marshmallows in our cars and head out for the woods where we would spend the entire weekend getting mosquito bites and scaring each other into oblivion around the campfire!! Rain or shine, that annual weekend has always been one of the highlights of my childhood.

As I got older though, I began notice the dynamic of certain relationships among my mother’s family and realized that many of the people I adored as a child really didn’t get along very well. Now, they seldom even talk to each other and family gatherings like those of our younger days are simply unheard of. This made me wonder if they actually got along during our annual camping trips or if they just tolerated each other for the sake of being a family. Or better yet, if they tolerated each other for the sake of all these little kids that would maybe (hopefully) grow up having a different relationship than they had??

It intrigues me when I think about how hard that must have been for some of my family; to be trapped in the woods together and having to endure each other’s company for entire long weekend. The diplomacy that must have been required to keep the peace in an otherwise hostile environment…I can only imagine. The thing is though, that when I do imagine it…it makes me sad. I don’t want that for our children (one day!) or any other of our nieces and nephews, as I truly believe that one of the best things that we can do for the children of our family is to love each other.

As I write this from the Smyth family house in Australia, I think that I may have uncovered the key to my own family’s lack of longevity; As I mentioned, families are complicated and there is simply no way around that. You can’t bring people together from different experiences and expect otherwise but you can become a part of each other’s experiences. All relationships require time and energy…they require a genuine interest in each other’s lives and they require shared experiences in order to exist beyond the superficialities of holiday dinners. And that is the very reason that Steve and I are here in Canberra right now…so that we can share in this experience with Jeff and Monica and allow it to become part of the relationship that we already have with them. It’s not just about traveling the world and seeing new together…it’s about living together for a week and sharing in each other’s anxieties about the possibility of that becoming a motive for homicide. It’s about enduring the grumpy days with the happier ones. It’s about being reunited after four months and having to say goodbye again for another six. It’s about enduring a wine-induced night of watching Borat with too much chocolate!!! It’s about expecting less of each other and accepting more of each other.

While our families may be one of the biggest challenges that we face in our lives…the relationships to be had within them is worth all our efforts. After all…for better or for worse… "we are family"!

For more pictures from Canberra, click here.

Diaries from Down Under

Chapter Five

Tuesday, April 15th, 2008

Just before we left for Australia, Julie bought me Jane Austen’s epic novel, Pride and Prejudice. The avid reader and book lover that I am had never read any of her works before and Julie’s literary mind simply couldn’t comprehend this. Actually, Julie is not the only person that has been surprised to hear this! For many years now, when people inspect our book collection (aka. The Smyth archives!), they are often puzzled to not find a well loved version of at least one of Austen’s novels.

Growing up, few things agitated me more than having to read the likes of Shakespeare, Margaret Atwood and yes, Jane Austen, only to find myself having to dissect the very story that I fell in love with. The writer in me understood the importance of such analysis but, the reader in me cringed at the very thought of it. Books were meant to take your imagination away and open you up to a whole new world. English literature classes betrayed this very covenant that I had between my self and my beloved bookshelf.

At long last though, thanks to Julie’s undying love for Jane Austen, I too have fallen in love all over again! I’m in the final moments of Pride and Prejudice and I can’t get enough of it. It’s so beautiful and romantic, and for the first time, I understand the passionate love affair that occurs between Austen and her readers.

Most of my books have very important significance to me. Beautiful stories aside, each one reminds me of a specific time in life, a season, an emotion, a person and sometimes, when all else failed, I clung to those novels as a life line anchoring me to a world a little less turbulent than my own.

This being said, not only is Jane Austen going to have a permanent place on my book shelf and in my heart, but Pride and Prejudice is going to be the common thread that followed me through a less than common adventure! While we have changed seasons four times, taken nine different flights, changed time zones seven times and changed our lives eternally, I’ve also found myself rooted in the romantic life of Elizabeth Bennett at the turn of the century. While I’ve been out chasing kangaroos and dodging snakebites, she’s been juggling the likes of Mr. Darcy and Mr. Wickham. I find it amusing that even back then, men still managed to cause us so much grief!! I’ve found myself living so many alternate lives this month, and I suppose, in the end, that’s what experience is really about…stepping outside of yourself in order to broaden your peripheral vision.

Like most of my books, I never want them to end. It takes me the same amount of time to finish the last ten pages as it does the entire rest of the book. Like so many other things in my life, I tend to have a hard time letting go. While I’m eager to know what happens, I’m also sad about not being lost in the language anymore.

Ms. Bennett and Mr. Darcy…I reckon that you should call of upon your carriage and join me in a fortnight in Ottawa! I hear that the weather will be simply splendid!!

Diaries from Down Under

Chapter Four

Sunday, April 13th, 2008

Anyone who’s done any degree of long distance running knows all too well the concept of hitting the wall. It’s that crucial moment in which the mind no longer functions with the body and your hamster inevitably falls off the wheel. For so many things, mind over matter is the ultimate deciding factor but, when you hit the wall, your ability to rationalize and see the light at the end of the tunnel minimizes drastically.

On the long distance, stamina requiring marathon that is our discovery of Australia, day ten was most definitely the moment in which I hit the wall. Our final day in the Outback took its toll on me and luckily (or perhaps unluckily) it did so for Steve as well. A certain degree of stress comes with any vacation but, in our case, this trip required a great deal of planning and organization. We’ve been really busy since our arrival in Australia in an attempt to see as much as possible during our short time here. With so much to do and not a lot of time to do it in, nearly every day here has been planned ahead of time. In our first two weeks, we’ve stayed at four different hotels, taken five different flights and changed time zones with each one. All this to say that by the time we left Central Australia, our stamina was running low and our mental health was depleting with it!

Fortunately (yes, there is a bright side here!), amongst our exceptional planning, we also anticipated this very set back!! Steve and I know each other and ourselves well enough to know that ten days is usually our limit before we start to feel a little homesick and worn out. This time, we took prevented measures…

A month ago, we booked ourselves into a beautiful resort in the small town of Port Douglas. We decided it was time to let someone take care of us for the day!! So, early on Saturday morning, we drove one hour along the coast from Cairns to Port Douglas to the very luxurious Sheraton Mirage Hotel Resort. Surrounded by seven acres of saltwater lagoons, this hotel is simply legendary! We proceeded to spend the entire day napping in the sun, swimming in the lagoons and walking along the beach. After a lovely dinner in town, we returned to our room for a rest in our Jacuzzi, watched Harry Potter and ate Australia’s 84% cream chocolate! It was just the rest that we needed after ten amazing days of adventure!!

With the break under our belt, we are now set for the last stretch before we head home. We took a train ride today to the small village of Kuranda, located high up in the rainforest and made our way back down via the rare commute of taking a cable car! Tomorrow, we are hoping that the weather will cooperate for our reef tour and our last day in Cairns. We are due to visit two areas of the reef and spend a good five hours of snorkeling. The clouds were rolling in tonight around dinner time but, we are keeping our fingers crossed that we will have one more day of adventure conducive weather.

Come Tuesday, it’s off to Canberra to spend our last week with the real reason that we came here in the first place…to see Jeff, Monica and the kids! After this huge Australian Adventure, I can’t think of any better way to finish it off than with four of our favourite people.

Monday, April 14th, 2008

I got to touch a sea turtle today! How incredible is that?!?! We were out snorkeling on the Great Barrier Reef when I spotted the turtle. I swam over to him, reached my hand out and just then, he rose to the surface and the tips of my fingers grazed the outside of his shell. He barely even seemed to notice that I was there.

The ocean never fails to blow my mind! Seeing creatures like a sea turtle in the open sea is very humbling to me. It is a vivid reminder of an unseen world that that lies all around us. I love being in the ocean but, every now and then, I get awakened to its vastness and power, and startle myself into praying that it doesn’t eat me alive!!!

Our day on the Reef was fantastic! We woke up at the crack of dawn to head out for the pier. Our sailboat, the Passions of Paradise, took us two hours out into the ocean for the tiny destination of Michaelmas Island, a bird sanctuary and our first snorkeling site. The waters were rough and for a good chunk of the morning, we thought that the tail end of the Eastern Coast’s rainy season might unleash upon us but, sure enough, the clouds parted and left us with a spectacular day.

We had lunch on the boat, met new friends and headed out for our second site along the Reef. Being in deeper waters this time made for an entirely different perspective of the Reef and a different appreciation for how fierce the ocean can be. While Michaelmas Island was very shallow and easy to manage…the open water of our second site was similar to the continental shelf; once the you reached the edge of the Reef, you also felt like you had reached the edge of the earth!!! The vast darkness that loomed beyond the Reef was haunting and while I admire the scuba divers that braved its elements, you would never find me venturing off the edge of that cliff!

By the end of the day, we were exhausted yet energized. Exhausted for the sun and the swimming and the all the excitement of the day. Energized from having seen one of the most beautiful natural wonders of the world and gaining a new appreciation for the need to protect it.

Someone asked me today what I would remember most about my trip here and I told them, “the colours”. Every time I look at something, it seems to have the most vivid of colours; the birds, the fish, the sky…they all have a vibrancy that I’ve never experienced before and may never see again. Perhaps it’s the more observant side of me having the time to notice or perhaps it’s genuinely the various elements that make up this phenomenal place but, either way, I have found that when I close my eyes at night, not only have I seen the world a bit differently, but the colours have seeped into my dreams as well. I can’t possibly think of a better souvenir than that!

Good Night and Sweet Dreams…


For more pictures from Port Douglas and Cairns, click here.

I may be in a hockey-less land...but I still believe!

Diaries from Down Under

Chapter Three

Tuesday, April 8th, 2008

We left Sydney this morning for our adventure in the Outback of Central Australia. Also known as “The Red Centre”, the Outback is considered one of the most treacherous terrains on the planet. For anyone driving into the Outback, visitors are encouraged to register with government officials both on their way in and on their way out as a means of monitoring everyone’s safety. I read a shocking statistic not too long ago that said that an average of 400 tourists die in Australia every year. That includes car accidents and heart attacks, but still - it seems like a lot!!

We flew into a town called Alice Springs and were doing the five hour drive to our resort from there. For the brief amount of time that we spent in Alice Springs…I couldn’t help but think that it left much to be desired! Close your eyes and picture the hottest, dirtiest, smelliest place you can think of. Then, give everyone there a cigarette…take some broken beer bottle pieces and sprinkle them on top…and then you have Alice Springs! Delightful, isn’t it?!?! Like I said though, our time there was very brief and I’m sure that there is more to it that we’re not seeing but, as far as first impressions go, I was really glad to be heading out of town as quickly as possible.

When we first arrived into Alice Springs, the Australians were very kind in welcoming us to the Outback. What they really meant to say though was “Death looms in the Outback…we hope you enjoy your visit”!!! Everywhere you turn, someone is trying to tell you how nuts you were for coming out here in the first place! Our car rental has a little sticker on the front window that says “Arrive Alive” and every rest stop (if you can call a little hut in the desert with a bench under it a rest stop) along the highway has a sign that says “Rest, Revive, Survive”. Even at our hotel, amongst all of the wonderful little booklets regarding hotel amenities and excursions, there is a separate little flyer that says “Don’t Risk Your Life”. Really…eight hours into it and I already want to turn back!!!

Life threatening dangers aside though, I can say that the Outback is stunning. I’ve never seen anything like it in my life and I can understand what draws people out here. What makes people want to live out here is a different story entirely but, as for spending all of your savings for a brief glimpse of this hidden landscape…I’d be the first one to step up and tell you to do the same. While the heat may cost you your health and the bugs may cost you your sanity…the view is priceless!

Wednesday, April 9th, 2008

I had dinner under the Southern Cross tonight. In fact, I saw the night sky in a way that I have never before seen it in my life and it was spectacular.

Steve and I joined one hundred other guests tonight to experience the award winning “Sounds of Silence” dinner. This excursion is considered one of the top tourist attractions in the country and I can say without a doubt that what Central Australia lacks in tourism marketing, they make up for with fine dining.

A tour bus picked us up at our hotel lobby and drove all of us out to a sand dune in between Ayers Rock and another legendary formation called The Olgas. From there, waiters and waitresses greeted us with champagne and appetizers of kangaroo (sorry Dad!) and crocodile while we watched the sun set in the desert. Shortly there after, we were taken to our tables where we literally had dinner in the middle of the Outback. Beautiful tables with white linen were placed on the red sand of the desert and we spent the next three hours enjoying dinner, literally, in the middle of nowhere. Our “dining room” and the “kitchen” were roped off and that was all that protected us from whatever was roaming the Outback after dark. Our tables were lit with beautiful pillar candles and for the remainder of the evening we feasted on Australian delicacies (and some specialties that were a bit more familiar!) while we were guided through some of the historical culture of Central Australia. Ironically enough, we found ourselves sharing a table with three other Canadians…one from Toronto and one from Ottawa. The rest of our dinner guests were from Brisbane and the U.K. So, in between all of the banter about soccer and rugby, you’ll be proud to know that the Canadians managed to throw a little hockey trash talk around the table by night’s end!!

Finally, just before dessert, we blew out all of the candles and an astronomer joined in to walk us through the night sky…a sky that I am convinced can only be seen from very few places in the world. The moon set early in the evening and the sky was so free of light pollution that we were able to see two galaxies with the naked eye…it was incredible. I wished on no less than four shooting stars and saw the rings of Saturn through one of the telescopes that were provided for us. Our very noticeable winter constellation of Orion is currently sitting quite low on the horizon of the Southern Hemisphere and though he’s upside down, it was delightful have a familiar face join us for dinner!!

Thursday, April 10, 2008

It was 38 degrees celcius today in the Outback and I’ve decided that I have developed quite the love/hate relationship with this place. On the one hand, it’s one of the most outstanding places that I’ve ever seen…It’s beautiful and stunning and mysterious and unique. On the other hand, it’s very clear why it’s so untouched by man…It’s harsh and cruel and demanding and ruthless.

We haven’t had a lot of time in Yulara (the region around Ayers Rock) but, truth be told, I don’t know that I could spend much more time here. We leave tomorrow for the Great Barrier Reef and the very thought of water brings comfort to my soul. The Outback has this quiet eeriness about it that I can’t quite explain. It’s as though the land is very well aware of who calls the shots around here. The Outback is never conquered…it’s only visited. And even then, that only happens when you’re given permission.

We drove out to visit another area today called King’s Canyon. It took us three hours on a road with nothing more than a single gas station only to discover after twenty minutes on the trail that we wanted to go back to our hotel. Numerous animals died along the highway during the night and the temperature soared come daybreak. It left a gruesome display of the power of nature and a swift reminder that man only possesses the illusion of power.

In a weird way though, it’s almost comforting to know that there are still some places on this planet we call home that simply can’t be controlled.

For more pictures for our trip in the Outback, click here.

For more pictures from our trip to the Blue Mountains, click here.

Diaries from Down Under

Chapter Two

Friday, April 4th, 2008

Do you remember that feeling that comes with the first true weekend of summer??? For those of us in Ottawa, it’s usually around mid May. You wake up one beautiful Saturday morning and the sun is shining and the air is finally warm enough to release your feet from the bondage that is wool socks! What’s so great about those first warm days is that you usually head outside as quickly as you can and spend as much time as possible soaking in the rays that haven’t been felt in six months for fear that come the next morning, it just might be snowing again. More times than not…it usually is. By 3pm or so, your body is so tired from the fresh air and sunshine that your ambitious plan of a hot night on the town turns into a backyard BBQ and renting some movies. By Monday morning, the evidence of our summer freedom is seen by our sun burnt faces and the look of euphoria from our brief visit with warmth. It’s the winter bound version of divine!!

Today was just like that for Steve and I! After being in a jet lagged induced coma for many hours, we woke up just before the sun feeling refreshed and suddenly excited at the realization that we were in Australia. We decided to wake along the shore and watch the sunrise (which was fairly anti-climatic, but still, only something that can be done on vacation!!!). Sydney is a fairly quiet city first thing in the morning and nothing was more peaceful than being along the ocean watching the world wake up.

We decided to spend our first full day in Australia at the Taronga Zoo…a fifty acre piece of land along the cliffs of Sydney Harbour full of animals, birds and plant species that I’ve only ever seen on the Discovery Channel. The land in which you can find Taronga Zoo was actually named a National Park many years back which, given the billions of dollars worth of potential real estate that could be found there, is quite impressive on the part of the Australian Government.

What’s so amazing about the zoo is the fact that so much of the natural wildlife and habitat there could only be found in artificial climates in Canada. Instead, here in Australia, we simply spent hours walking outside among all of the wildlife that would normally live there. Amazing!

Anyways, by the time we caught our boat ride home, our faces were burnt and our bodies were exhausted with the fresh ocean air. Since we couldn’t have a backyard BBQ or rent movies, we instead went to a fantastic Italian courtyard for dinner and watched the Sydney Harbour Bridge light up as the sun went down.

I love the island of summer!



Sunday, April 6th, 2008

We woke up to another beautiful, sunny and warm day this morning. The Harbour waters were calm and after only minutes of being awake…we realized that the ocean was calling our name!!

The city of Sydney functions off of a very impressive network of train systems (both subway and monorail), public buses and best of all, the Sydney Ferry Corporation. The entire harbour has no less than two dozen piers in which the ferries stop and, without even an ounce of exaggeration, you could set your watch by the efficiency of the ferries.

While it may not be quite as conventional as hoping on a harbour tour cruise, Steve and I opted for purchasing ourselves a day pass for the ferries and seeing Sydney not only by boat, but by our own watches as well!

I’ve come to the conclusion that something in my blood requires me to be near water. The ocean soothes my soul in a way that very few other things do and I was more than happy to spend the day roaming from bay to bay, with or without my sea legs! Our day managed to take us to Watson’s Bay, the original area in which the Gap of Sydney Harbour was protected from intrusion; Darling Harbour, a very lively area just around the corner from the Harbour Bridge that docks most of the large cruise ships coming into Sydney, and the two surfing towns of Bondi Beach and Manly. Both beach towns are famous for their historic contributions to the sport of surfing as well as for being two of the first beaches to create surf rescue teams. They both happen to also be crawling with tanned, highly “sculpted” surfers who would rather ride the waves than eat!

I had mentioned to Steve early upon our arrival that everyone in Sydney seemed so relaxed. Very few people seemed to be stressed out or running ragged like we so often appear to be doing back home. Steve said that it’s easy to say that when we’re the ones on vacation! I didn’t believe him until we took the ferry back to Circular Quay from Manly. The sun was just beginning to go down over the cliffs of the Harbour and after a long day spent in the landscape of Sydney, we were silently sitting on the outdoor deck of the boat. For me, it’s nearly meditative to quietly sit along the water and watch nature as its best. As I sat there, I was finding myself in complete disbelief that this very boat ride was someone else’s daily commute and quickly began suffering from a severe case of “The Grass is Greener” syndrome. Right then, an Australian guy about our age sitting next to me began talking on his cell phone. He was telling someone on the other end about having just left his girlfriend’s place after a big argument and how he thought it was over. After years of having been together as a couple, he finally started to believe that things between them just might not work. He didn’t spend much time on the phone but it was more what he didn’t say that touched me the most. For the rest of the ferry ride, he just sat there, staring out into the ocean with the most melancholy expression of his face. You could tell that despite the stunning sunset and the calmness of the water, he wanted nothing more than to be far, far away from this place. I wanted desperately to tell him that, for whatever it’s worth, heartbreak isn’t any easier where we came from either.

That’s when I realized that Steve was indeed right. Being caught up in the midst of ones adventures makes it easy to overlook the day-to-day life that is going on around you. Believe it or not, a bad hair day and grumpy commutes happen even in the overwhelming beauty that is Australia.

Unfortunately, heartbreak is heartbreak…with our without a tan.

Monday, April 7, 2008

We woke up this morning, our last day in Sydney, to torrential rain…and a perfect excuse to stay curled up in bed a little bit longer! Despite the apparently wet summer that Sydney has had, the weather has been remarkably wonderful during our stay. They were calling for rain nearly every day of our stay and luckily for us, this morning was the first we saw of it! Clear skies and warm wind was the only thing to be found on the menu!

I keep forgetting to mention this but, Steve and I decided to stay in a little Bed & Breakfast in Sydney called The Russell Hotel. It’s square in the middle of an area called The Rocks…the original settlement of Australia and as far as I’m concerned, one of the most beautiful places on earth!!! The entire neighborhood, which is literally across the street from the Harbour Bridge and the Sydney Opera House, is row upon row of cobblestone courtyards and historic architecture. You could spend hours walking around this relatively small area of town and never see the same thing twice.

I’m not sure if all of Australia is like this but, Sydney, at the very least, has been very culturally influenced by British rule. The parks and buildings share many of the same names and they seem to share a similar fondness for cuisine. In a nutshell, the Aussies love their coffee and desserts!!! So much so that even McDonald’s has what they call the McCafe. So while the little ones eat their happy meals, Mom and Dad can sip on their espresso with the utmost convenience!

Anyways, each morning, as we wake up, we have been joining the other guests in the hotel dining room for breakfast. Without hesitation, I can say that this has been the best part of my day during our stay in Sydney. Steve and I have staked our claim on one of the tables by the window overlooking the street and each morning, we eat croissants, fresh fruits and listen to either classical or opera music resonate through the twenty foot ceilings of the restaurant. I never really would have thought of myself as “European” in this capacity but, sure enough, I now enjoy nothing more than the soothing sounds of Pavarotti first thing in the morning and overly decadent pastries. Who knew?!?!?

And sure enough, by the time we finished our leisurely wake up ritual, the sun came out and wanted to play again…and I’m certainly not one to turn down an offer like that!!

For more pictures from Sydney, click here.

Diaries from Down Under

Chapter One

Wednesday, April 2nd (I think!), 2008

The entire concept of time is lost on me right now! I know that we left Tilbury for the Detroit airport at 1pm on Tuesday afternoon. We gained an hour arriving in Dallas. We gained another two hours arriving in Los Angeles. We are about to cross over the International Date Line somewhere and shortly there after, we’ll lose fifteen hours arriving in Sydney. On top of that, I still haven’t set my watch to daylight savings time! So, according to my calculations, it should be sometime around…October!!!!

As some of you may already know, I spent most of my childhood growing up around airplanes. My Dad spent his entire career working for Canadian Airlines and my uncle was, and still is, a pilot for Air Canada. With this being said, I’ve been flying the friendly skies for as long as I can remember. The funny is though, that while I had a great affection for airports and for flying, I never really liked traveling very much. Most of my time in the air was spent traveling between my home in Ottawa and my home in London…but beyond that, I never considered flight as anything more than a commute.

Both of my parents were desperate to see the world and had they had their way, their feet never would have touched the ground but as for myself, I’ve always been more like Beth…the middle daughter from the classic novel Little Women, who was forced to watch everyone come and go because she loved nothing more than to be at home.

I did travel quite a bit when I was young but even now, I don’t think that most people had any idea how anxious the idea of visiting a foreign country made me. Most of the time, I would quickly find myself able to adjust, at the very least, temporarily but, at other times, the anxiety of being away from home would make me physically ill. While most found traveling to be an adventure waiting to happen, I considered traveling to be a prison that bound me into unfamiliarity. Not knowing where I was or what was around me was terrifying to me, which in turn, made me feel extremely unsafe.

I’ve been thinking about all of these past feelings towards traveling as I sit on this plane that has another twelve hours to fly over the Pacific Ocean because, for some reason, that anxiety has dissipated. While there has certainly been stressed involved in preparing for our trip…I’m not in the least fearful of what my mental and emotional reaction to the travel may be. I think the difference is that a part of my heart is in Australia now and the biggest part of my heart is desperately trying to sleep in a cramped seat next to me.

Home is what used to be safe…now, it’s the smiling faces that either greet us at the airport or the loved ones that enduring pain staking layovers with you to get to that airport.

For better or for worse, the sky connects us all!





Thursday, April 3, 2008

We made it! We have made our way through the well-oiled machine that is Aussie Customs and we’ve never felt so tired in our entire lives! We managed about six hours of sporadic sleep on the flight and were determined to stay awake long enough to fall asleep with the sun. This, I can assure you, has been no easy feat! We are standing on our very last legs right now and at any second, our rapidly closing eyelids will bow down and admit defeat.

I have to say though, that if there is ever a city that can keep you entertained when you are running on fumes…Sydney Australia is that city! Sydney is FANTASTIC! We have spent the day walking around the harbour, admiring the Sydney Opera House from every angle and taking in the Sydney Botanical Gardens. So far, in our first eight hours here, I have fallen in love with this place.

The landscape of Sydney is phenomenal and I wish that there was anything I could say that would even remotely do it justice…but alas, I have only this…


…because as the saying goes…a picture says a thousand words and as our own new saying goes…jet lag gives us a thousand reasons to go to bed without dessert!!! It doesn’t happen often…but tonight I long for sweet dreams instead!

Leaving On A Jet Plane...

...All my bags are packed...I'm ready to go...

Early on Saturday morning, we said goodbye to our new house…


…and nine hours later, drove into Tilbury…

Four or five times a year, the drive between Ottawa and Tilbury becomes our Smyth family migration! Whether it be holidays, special occasions or too long between visits, the Smyth B&B is always a place of reprieve for Steve and I. Under the protective custody of our home away from home, we are given the opportunity to unplug from the electrically charged outlet that is our life and recharge our batteries. Sometimes I wonder how we would ever get through life without our weekends of homemade brownies and big family breakfasts.

This is the first time that our trip to Tilbury is actually just merely a fraction of our journey. Tomorrow afternoon, we head for Detroit for twenty-eights hours of flight time on our way to Sydney. Despite this obvious difference in destination, our time spent in Tilbury has still provided the very “recovery” that we need before such a venture…

For the past two days, I’ve slept twelve hours a night, sipped wine, laughed with family, indulged in home made cheesecake and taken a slight pause between having left two months of an extreme pace and the upcoming trip of a lifetime. With this little break in our life under our belt, I think that we’re officially ready for take off!

God Bless This Home!

Is there something in the water these days…???

I wanted to take a quick break from all of our new house and Australia talk to mention some really exciting news among some of our favourite people…

As it turns out, fall of 2008 is going to bring many new and wonderful faces to our world that Steve and I simply can’t wait to meet!!!

Colin & Sandra are expecting their first on August 29th, Mark & Helene are expecting their second on September 13th and Mark & Trish are expecting the newest Brinkman on September 15th. So wonderful!

With all the little ones due right around the same time, it will give us a great opportunity to chart their progress! You know, who’s walking first…who’s talking first…who’s quoting Shakespeare first..!!! I think it will be very good for everyone’s self esteem!!!

I’ve been meaning to post here numerous times over the course of this week but as it turns out…ditching your boss for a month isn’t as easy as it sounds!! Every day this week has been a whirlwind of loose ends and one small crisis after another. At the end of the day though, our flight is taking off whether all the work is done or not. And you better believe that I’m going to be on it!!!

I went to my last bible study class this past week. I’ve been studying the Apologetics with Brother David for a little over two years now and I can say, without a shadow of a doubt, that our last four months of study together has been among some of the most challenging discussions I’ve ever had. The Church is often criticized for not keeping up with the times and progressing at the same speed in which society appears to be. The more I study though, the more I’m convinced that we need the Church’s stability to keep us grounded. Our society lives on the edge of a very slippery slope cloaked in a veil of progress and tolerance. While we bask in our nobility of “putting up with each other”, we are actually falling far short of God’s expectations which requires us to actually respect one another and not just tolerate each other. We are to recognize and acknowledge each other’s human dignity as creations of God’s image…this is a standard that sadly enough, we don’t seem to collectively hold ourselves to. As Children of God, we are not to settle for the lesser of two evils…instead, we are to raise the bar, hold each other accountable and change our lives. The strong conviction of the Church and its people, rooted in thousands of years of structure and discipline, is sown together with the threads of higher standards. Needless to say that this past “semester” of the Apologetics has left me with a lot to think about regarding the contributions that I make towards honouring human dignity. I am constantly left in wonder of God’s grace and the potential that He sees in all of us…

On another note, the Gallery hosted the Vernissage for the Governor General’s Awards for Media and Visual Arts tonight. It’s always so incredible to see people’s passions and life long work get recognized in such a manner, and to know that you’ve played a part in it, as small as it may be, is often very moving. Dare I say it…but yes, there are sights and sounds that I will miss about my job while I’m away!!

Cue the therapist…this isn’t normal!!!

This is how France and I feel about having Joanne N. so far away! Korea better appreciate what they have because our pouting knows no bounds over here in Ottawa!!!

We miss you Joanne! xoxo

"Easter says you can put truth in a grave, but it won't stay there."
~ Clarence W. Hall


For more pictures from our Easter Weekend, click here.

Five years ago this evening, I did my first communion. Five years ago this evening, I stood before God and chose a different path. Five years ago this evening, I entered a life of higher expectation and a miracle that was larger than life.

As a child, I was baptized as a Catholic but, neither one of my parents are religious people and the Church was never part of our life. We often attended mass for Christmas or Easter but I think it’s fair to say that none of us truly had a relationship with God of any kind…my parents, by choice and my self, for lack of knowing any thing different.

I don’t imagine that it’s ever easy coming into your faith. Pope John Paul II strongly believed that people had to move away from God in order to find their way back to Him. He also believed that the Church’s most important role was to give people a place to go when they finally did find their way back. Finding your faith as an adult though is an emotional roller coaster that can take you to some of the deepest and darkest places of your soul. As adults, we’ve often created our own prisons of fear and anger that get strongly challenged while in the presence of great conviction.

My own story really doesn’t have a whole lot to tell. I have been drawn to churches for as long as I can remember and while something continually called to me, I seldom ever entered its sanctuary. One faithful day, I was telling an old friend about it and she invited me to go to church with her one day. I went…I fell in love and the rest is a history wrought with tears and surrender. People often ask me what made me choose the Catholic Church. I always answer the same thing… “I didn’t choose it…I chose me”. And that’s the truth.

At the time, nearly five and half years ago, my life was a much darker place than it is now. I was lost and struggling. I was angry and hurt and frustrated. I felt more broken that I ever have in my entire life. While I don’t remember feeling a great deal of sadness at the time, I do remember feeling a lot of indifference, which looking back, is so much worse. The moment that hopelessness sets in is the moment that the fires in your heart begin to extinguish and you have to hope like hell that the devil doesn’t come and claim payment that day.

My eight months in preparation for my first communion was an extremely difficult and deeply spiritual experience. I realized time and time again that the scars of my past were real and that if I was ever going to heal, I had to let go and find room in my heart for forgiveness…room to forgive myself. At some point in time, I had to stop punishing myself for everything that I couldn’t make right and for all the people that I couldn’t make happy. At some point in time, I had to allow my life to be shaped by the people that did love me as oppose to the people that refused to love me.

The morning of my communion, my group and I met in the basement of our church. Holy Week had been a marathon of church services and most of us would find ourselves weeping from emotional exhaustion that was overwhelming at times. Father Joe asked that he be given a moment with each of us to express, through prayer, what he had learned about our individual journeys to this day. When my turn came, he placed his hands on my head, Father Michael held my hands and while I tears streamed down my face, I heard Father Joe whisper “I pray that you will be healed of your past hurts enough to recognize your future husband when he walks into your life.”

Two weeks later, I met Steve.

My relationship with my husband is nothing short of miraculous. My relationship with God is nothing short of spectacular. And every year, on this day, I take a moment to look back and remember the incredible blessings and grace that was bestowed on me that Saturday evening. Little did Father Joe know that I would be healed of my past hurts because my husband walked into my life. My husband is my proof of God’s love and compassion for lost souls that are just trying to find their way back. Of course, even marriage doesn’t provide any guarantees and marriage in no way heals the wounds that only you can take care of but, sometimes, certain experiences stand out in our lives so clearly as the hand of God. Love does heal all wounds and love is God’s greatest gifts. Love is acknowledging our hopelessness and taking us by the hand anyways. Love is sacrificing your only Son so that the rest of us could spend eternity by your side.

May the miracles of your life shine ever brightly this weekend, for the greatest miracle of all has already happened…

This past weekend, we opened our house to thirty of our closest friends and finally, turned it into a home!

The result was a chocolate fiesta beyond our wildest intentions and an evening filled with good laughs, great food and runaway cameras!!

I like to think that I always make a really big effort to fully appreciate the people in my life but, this past weekend, I was overwhelmed by how amazing our friends really are. As they called in babysitters, travelled from out of town, spent hours sharing with us and added their own personal touch to our new home, I found myself feeling truly astounded by the incredible people that we have come to surround ourselves with.

It was many hours into the morning before we finally made it to bed but, even then, I had a hard time sleeping because I was thinking about how great it was to have everyone with us. While we always make an effort to keep in touch as much as possible with our friends, it isn’t always easy to do so as much as you would like when the forces of nature step in the way. But then, there are moments when you manage to all come together, laugh a little louder and remember why you love being friends in the first place.

I was sad to see everyone go but, it’s time to focus our attention elsewhere now. The Land Down Under awaits us and we only have eight working days left! As it is with any major change in life…eventually, it stops being a change and just starts being life. And apparently, life is what happens when you’re busy planning a housewarming party!!!

For more pictures from the party, click here.

For pictures from Jamie's album, click here.

People have been asking me lately how Lent has been going. I’m not quite sure if Lent is something that all branches of Christianity practice but, I know that for Catholics, Lent is a very sacred time of reflection, renewal and discipline. Normally, I thrive during Lent. Devoting myself to a deeper spiritual commitment has always cleansed my soul in a way that renews me for the rest of the year.

As for this year, for lack of a better description, Lent has been a train wreck! I’ve come to the conclusion that the weeks surrounding any major life change (in my case, a big move) is not the time for discipline! When I come to think of it though, 2008 in general has been a bit of struggle regarding my religious devotion. I haven’t been very reliable in attending mass and my appearances at Bible Study have been rather sporadic.

In moments like this…I have a tendency to get a bit disappointed with myself because I know deep down that it’s during tumultuous times (good or bad) that I need to ground myself even more in my faith. The church is built on a rock for a reason…because it makes for a very solid foundation when we need it most. However, it was at this time that I remembered something that Elizabeth Gilbert spoke of in her book Eat Pray Love; She mentioned a little tale that was often told in India about a group of very devout monks that would spend hours a day praying. The only problem was that one of the monks had a very annoying cat! The cat would constantly spend his time intertwined in everyone’s legs and meowing relentlessly. So, as a solution, the monks decided to tie the cat up to a tree while they were praying. For years, every day, the monks would tie the cat to the tree and begin praying. Then, one day, the cat died and suddenly, the monks couldn’t pray. They found themselves unable to concentrate anymore because the cat wasn’t tied to the tree.

This was told as a cautionary tale to not let the routine and rituals of your religion determine your relationship with God. While each ritual is beautiful and precious in its own way, God’s relationship is with you, with or without your household pet tied up in the backyard!

This made me feel a lot better because really, with that being said, my Lenten season has been one of the best. I’ve read more of my Bible in the first three months of 2008 than I have in all of 2007, and I’ve spoken to God and given Him my challenges more naturally than I ever have before. To put it bluntly, I’ve shown that I don’t need the cat to say the prayer! And I’m quite sure that new realms of spirituality like that have to make up, at least a little bit, for having eaten too many Mini Eggs!!

A friend of mine, Damon, posted this on his facebook page and I think it’s one of the greatest things I’ve ever seen!

Improv taken to a whole new level…

I love New York!

Okay…I give up! You found me…again!

For about six weeks now, I’ve enjoyed blogging without certain people lurking within the realms of my cyber world. While I enjoy having people stop by and joining in the fun, some people were visiting literally for months without ever making themselves known. Eventually, I started to probe a bit into the identity of my regular visitors as I much prefer to know who is choosing to share in my day to day life. Not only did this reveal nothing but, it actually caused some of them to start using proxy servers in order to keep themselves even more anonymous.

That annoyed me!

These visitors have no reason to believe that their presence wouldn’t be welcome however, going out of your way to make your identity unknown gives me every reason to believe that I likely don’t want them lurking around my site. Hence, I changed my site address.

Low and behold though…I’ve been tracked down again! And all at the same time none the less. Just this week, my visitor from Calgary, my visitor using some “internet for everyone” server and of course, the infamous “proxy lord” guest has re-appeared. Grrrr…

I have reason to believe that our “former” visitor from Bermuda is now our “new” visitor on proxy lord. One disappeared while the other suddenly appeared. Coincidence?? I do think it’s worth noting though that our visitor from Bermuda highly underestimated our cyber savvy abilities because we managed to figure out that they work at a law firm in Bermuda. We actually know which one too but, I’ll be so kind as to not mention it here.

Anyways, you win! Have your way with me if you must but, I certainly hope that you are proud of yourself for invading my cyber world once again!

I have to say though…I’m surprised that you think my life is so interesting that you would go to such lengths to follow along…

In that sense, I’ll take your lurking as a subtle compliment.